Coronavirus “Fear or Calm?”
As we read the news around the Coronavirus COVID-19, talk to our colleagues, family and friends some of us are feeling so overwhelmed, so gripped by fear that we are not thinking clearly.
Please know that we have the ability to react to this situation in several ways. We can follow the herd and continue to stock up like a famine/plague is descending upon us, stocking up with toilet paper and other necessities in a state of total fear or we can take a deep breath and calm down.
We have a choice with how we deal with this pandemic in a more helpful way.
Begin by absolutely acknowledging any fear and/or negative emotions you are experiencing fully. By bringing awareness to how we feel, we can choose our next steps with more rational clarity.
Do we really want to stay in fight/flight or in elevated stress hormones (high cortisol and high beta brainwaves), as if we are being chased by a lion and are running away from an attacker for hours, days, weeks or months? Hopefully not because it drains our immune system and stops us making balanced choices. When we are in a prolonged state of high stress, we shut down the Neocortex part of our brain which helps us to make rational decisions and instead we use the Reptilian part which helps us focus on immediate survival like animals and not like normal human beings, we are able to make rational conscious choices if we re-focus our attention.
What can we do about this?
We can decide that we will stop looking at the news feeling fearful and instead with an attitude of managed concern which is a mental and emotional state that can leave us informed but not infected and debilitated by the virus.
Returning our attention to the good in our lives, focusing on being or staying healthy, being happy, being aware of our thoughts and returning to more helpful and positive thoughts when we find ourselves returning to fear-based thinking.
The problem with focusing a large part of our attention on the virus is that fighting it, talking about it, feeling it, thinking about it, increases the likelihood that you will get it because when you focus on the unwanted aspect of something in an effort of pushing it away from you, it comes closer to you because what you give your energy to, you bring to you. It is irrelevant whether you want it or not.
If we deeply believe that we are healthy, that we will continue to stay healthy and laugh off the fear, seeing it as unnecessary and unhelpful, we will more than likely stay healthy. Our immune system is not as strong and does not continue to regenerate health and repair when we are in a heightened state of fear. It shuts down to focus the body's energy on survival.
By realising that and consciously changing our state we can come back into alignment. Using the following SUGGESTIONS will help. We want to get back into low beta brainwaves so that all parts of our brain are working coherently (Neocortex, limbic and reptilian).
My suggestion is to look after yourself and your loved ones by -
Staying hydrated by drinking plenty of water
Eating citrus fruits or take high-quality Vitamin C supplements daily
Continuing to eat healthily
Get outside into the sunshine for 30-minutes each day
Going for a nice walk, bike ride, yoga or some form of exercise as this will increase oxytocin levels and this makes us feel happier
Where possible grounding yourself by going barefoot on the moist grass, or at your local beach every day for a few minutes
Listen to happy and uplifting music
Being grateful for your health and know that we will get through this blip
Taking calm deep breaths for 5-minutes at a time, in and out through your nose multiple times a day.
Imagine counting in as you breath in through your nose for 4 counts, holding for 2 counts, breathing out for 6+ counts. As you breathe in, imagine that you are breathing in through your heart, saying to yourself "I am breathing in health” and on the exhale say in your mind “I am breathing out fear/stress/anger/frustration” or whatever you need to let go off.
This will help to get back into heart and brain coherence if performed several times a day
Meditate daily - bringing your focus inwards. Having a mantra of "Health" in your meditations will help. Know and feel that you are healthy and that you are immune to this virus.
Staying in a deep state of gratitude, happiness and calm.
Repeat the following affirmation many times a day if you would like to - I am strong and I will continue to stay healthy, I am calm and filled with compassion!
Working on being in a coherent heart and mind state as much as possible. Managed concern is ok and continue focusing staying healthy.
Big Hug, Nicole
If you would like to learn more or to book in a coaching session get in touch - firstname.lastname@example.org
Holding Love in Our Hearts
As I sit in my warm house, my family and I are a long way away from those affected from the violence in Christchurch, New Zealand. Still we sit in shock, in grief, wondering how this could have happened in our beautiful country. As a family, we have been talking about the suffering of those touched by the violent acts of hatred we wonder what we can do to help?
What Would Love Do?
The one question that springs to my mind is what would love do?
I think that this powerful question is a key one. What can we do?
We can choose to right now and going forwards to be more compassioning towards ourselves and others. This hating of others is absolutely the opposite, most unconstructive direction we can choose. The people filled with hatred have closed off their own hearts. Rather than focusing our attention and energy on those who have wronged others, how about instead refocusing our attention on being the most loving version of ourselves that we can be?
So, open your heart, share your emotions, cry, scream, feeling everything that you feel right now, sitting with it, allowing your tears, your emotions and all your pain to surface, and then allowing your love to shine through. Give yourself the gift of keeping your heart open, this is in itself an act of love.
We need to look after ourselves, this includes our mental and heart health before we can help others.
Maybe then give a loved one a heartfelt call, give someone a hug, and help someone in need, whether they are affected by the violence in Christchurch or not. Let's come together in loving intention.
Let's make a joint intention - "My intention is that I am going to be more loving to myself and others today".
Let me know in the comments below your feelings on that statement, you are of course vey welcome to make up your own loving statement and share that as well.
If you need support and want to talk you are welcome to call me.
Sending you love
I was very fortunate to attend the first Auckland Progressive Workshop with the world famous and very charismatic Dr Joe Dispenza.
The 2 1/2 day event based in Takapuna, on Auckland's North Shore was incredible. Listening to Joe explain the neuroscience, the extensive research that he and his team of scientists have been undertaking and hearing the large number of accounts the previous students who have trained with Joe have experienced while doing his meditations was mind-blowing.
In order to attend this Progressive workshop you have to do the Stage 1 online course called the Intensive Workshop, and then either attend or complete online the Progressive Workshop, before being able to take part in a profoundly life changing 1 week advanced workshop somewhere in the world. His Auckland Progressive workshop sold out quickly, as did the Advanced workshop on the Gold Coast which he flew to directly after this event.
I am very keen to attend an Advanced Workshop, and I can highly recommend his work. It is engaging, mind opening and life changing. I am very, very grateful.
There is so much magic and profound healing happening through consistent and powerful meditation.
If you aren't already meditating regularly, I recommend that you start today. Put your heart and soul into each practice. If you want your life to change for the better, decide right now to make a new habit, one that includes living in the 'NOW' more than in the past or future, with love and gratitude.
Turn your attention inwards through meditation, and on the journey you may just come out a new, less stressed, happier and healthy you.
Watch this space as I continue on my journey with Dr Joe's meditations.
For more information about Joe's work please head over to https://drjoedispenza.com/
Mental Health Awareness
It's September and the world is talking about Mental Health Awareness - bringing this once taboo subject into the light.
In New Zealand, we have some of the highest self harm and suicide rates in the world. Most recently our beloved ex-TVNZ presenter, Greg Boyed, chose to end his life, just one of the 600 New Zealanders who decided to end their lives in the last 12 months.
It's a sobering thought that our annual suicide rate is twice our annual road death toll. You could well ask "Where are the suicide prevention sign posts, the check points, and the safety belts to make our mental health road trips safer?"
If suicide, attempted or merely contemplated, is the ultimate declaration of unhappiness, then surely it follows that it may have started with a much smaller level of mental dis-ease and discomfort.
Each and every one of us is privately engaged in an ever changing conversation with our inner voice(s), feelings, desires, and thoughts. In fact, formal studies suggest that we have 60,000 - 70,000 thoughts per day, and over 90% of these are similar to the thoughts we had the day before!
We each are constantly, both consciously and unconsciously, comparing our internal mental model to what we perceive to be the real world. When we each detect a discrepancy between what we want and what we have or expect to have, we make the mental choice to accept, deny, or do something about it - and we are each happy or unhappy as a consequence. Unchecked, thousands of discordant thoughts can lead to repeated, self-reinforcing and ultimately destructive feelings.
Fortunately, backed by numerous repeatable scientific studies, proven techniques and tools exist to establish and maintain a healthy, resilient mental state, in the face of the challenges, and the highs and lows that life brings. These approaches can be tailored by each of us, on the basis of what we experience and learn about ourselves, and allow us each to intervene if necessary to adjust the path of self-reinforcing behaviours.
When we each learn to acknowledge and our negative emotions and understand our beliefs around them, we can use proven techniques to build positive feelings and make more coherent and positive choices. We don't need to sacrifice honesty, vulnerability, or privacy to do so.
So, I would like to ask you - Are you or your co-workers experiencing:
My expertise is in supporting people like you, on an individual or group basis, to achieve more and feel better doing so, in and outside of work.
I do so with proven tools and techniques, which you utilise to get to the next level in terms of self-confidence, happiness, and achievement, on a supportive, confidential basis.
Get in touch today for more information!
email@example.com call 044995732 or 02102625148
Nicole Wijngaarden, Relationship | Mental Health & Wellbeing Coach Wellington, New Zealand